All is truly one. Still to understand it, one must divide it, and then devour it; bringing it back to one.
To truly live, you must be ready and willing to die.
To receive the Greatest Teacher, we must remain a defiant student.
Reject Nirvana, for suffering is meant to be endured not escaped or extinguished.
Never trust one that offers no trust to you. Should there be a glimmer of doubt, quickly make your way out.
When a mind is enlightened, it casts shadows onto the subconscious. Truly the more enlightened the mind, the darker the shadows we find.
Wisdom seeks it’s own certainties; not some “truth”. Therefore it is not hindered by dogmas or narrow-mindedness.
Sure to stand tall we can see farther, but this gives the sniper his mark. Sure the squeaky wheel gets the oil, but sometimes it gets replaced.
A show of strength creates weakness. To remain passive incites violence. Should we know our true animal self, we would realize; we can never know peace.
He who thinks himself special is the most mundane of all.
An alchemist puts everything to the black flame. By reduction, one can understand things at its elemental base.
One cannot cultivate a garden in soil that is already tainted. One cannot breathe freely when the air is restricted. One cannot be revitalized from ash and cinder. One cannot move through water fearlessly, without knowing the depths of it.
Hold these as virtues; awareness, endurance, and severance. Hold these as strengths; certainty, fortitude, and furtiveness. These virtues will nurture esteem, and strengths will adorn prestige.
Bare only esteem and prestige; illuminating as Lucifer. Insurgency and non-conformity are truly essential to evolution. Fear not the fall, instead find the strength to rise.
Be honourable and you will gain respect. Respect will bring you influence and influence is literally raw power.
Be silent and truly listen. Stay hidden and truly observe. Assume nothing and learn what things truly are.
Never expect the impossible and never grieve the irretrievable, and most of all; never fear the inevitable.
When something is revered as beautiful, it becomes ugly.
If a virtue is thought to be altruistic, it is not worthy.
Being rises up, born of non-being.
Balance in nature reveals nothing is equal.
Strength is gained by the learning of weaknesses.
As the old master in certainty teaches;
What is difficult can be easy, just as what’s easy can be made difficult.
To know this lights the path of effortlessness. The practice of observation and deed.
Life always ends in death. From death ALL life is nourished. This is the natural worldly order.
Know the truth of the self and be enlightened.
Know the truth of the world, and you have embraced wisdom.
Recognize where they cross each other and discover the insidious.
The second installment of The Ooze, This time Jason King, Venger Satanis, and Jason Sorrell join me to discuss Objective Reality. This series will unfortunately only be a few entries as apparently most of my files are now corrupt.
So I was going through files building and organizing a PDF library and I ran across a bunch of downloads of my favorite episodes of The Ooze. So I’ve decided to create a collection of them. This is the first one of that collection and it is fitting because it is the first episode that Mindfux of Nexion L316 appears on. I was joined by Jason King and Darkf00l as well. I thought I would share it here.
Even if man were nothing but a piano key, even if this were proved to him by natural science and mathematics, even then he would not become reasonable, but would purposely do something perverse out of sheer ingratitude, simply to have his own way…then, after all, perhaps only by his curse will he attain his object, that is, really convince himself that he is a man and not a piano key! If you say that all this, too, can be calculated and tabulated…then man would purposely go mad in order to be rid of reason and have his own way.–Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Today, I am going to disappoint you. This entry will let you down, and won’t be what you think it is to be. I have no intention of defining or revealing some aspect of the history of Satan, Lucifer, or “The Devil”. If you’d like to read something extremely thoughtful and well written to that end; Please check out Chloe 352’s article in Nexion Zine 7.1 titled “Notes on Satanism“. My aim is set to convey something of a different species , and to that I am certain to fail. None the less, I shall endure.
First I think it is important to nutshell my worldview. That my fellow traveler, will be no easy task. I probably, in my life time, could never write enough to paint the entire picture for you. Even if I spent 20 hours a day for the rest of my life. So I am going to try to sum it up in a few concepts. The first an allegory. The second is three quotes. The third a transgression. So let’s begin shall we?
When I first came across the thought experiment called “Schrodinger’s Cat”, I immediately understood the concept being related. The short of it; a cat sealed in box with poison. To observer, until the box is opened there is no way to determine if the cat is alive or dead. Therefore it remains in a superposition; that is both alive and dead. blah, blah, blah; not what I’m after. This is just where my thought experiment started. See it was irking me that the cat was a continuous observer and therefore the experiment was flawed.
I started thinking about my experience, if I was the cat. I realized as the cat, I was first intrigued. What cat doesn’t like a box? After the lid closed, I might be a little frightened. I would probably go looking for a way out, and in the process discover the poison. I am certain my heightened and attuned sense of smell would, I hope, clue me into the fact that I didn’t want to be in the box with this stuff. Then panic would set in, after all, it is just what nature does. After an undefined period of time, I would start to take for granted that this noxiousness was contained. Leaving me unaffected by it. Should enough time pass, I may even have convinced myself that the poison was not meant for me. After all, I am a good cat.
As my stay grows longer, so does my boredom. Fortunately this box is many sided and walled with mirrors on every side. In every direction, I can see many different cats. Each reacts as I act. Most of them, I think of as friends. Not the one directly in front of me. He keeps staring at me. To me this is a sign of aggression. We all spend our days playing and talking. Lately the conversations have become a bit more “heady”. We began to discuss how we got here and what we think will eventually happen. One of my friends on the right side, he is concerned about the poison. It is his opinion, that eventually it will open and kill us all. A few on the left side think, he is just being dramatic, and he should just stick to the evidence and what we know from experience. They argue an awful lot and sometimes that just stresses me out. I like to hold conversations with one of the cats above me. He is always making some profound statement with lofty ideals. He has me convinced that the cat in front of me isn’t actually being aggressive toward me, but rather is simply just as unsure of me, as I am of him. This might be true, because he does share a lot of my same features. Maybe I’ll give him a chance.
One day, I got curious about something puzzling. I decided to ask the cat above me about it. Being he is above me, he will know the answer. So I asked him, “What is out there, beyond what I can see?”. “Surely, since you are above me you can see further”. “Oh my!” he replied and grew silent for a very long time afterwards. Finally he said “I cannot honestly answer that question, but maybe if we can figure out what is going on inside what we can see; we will know more about the beyond”. Agreeing with him, I decided to get every cat here on the same page. The more the merrier right? Instead of two on a quest to understand the beyond, we will have the thinking power of many. After that every cat eventually joined our quest for this knowledge. Some of our discoveries seemed earth moving and awe-inspiring. Yet none seemed to answer the question of the beyond. Finally what was always meant to be happened, the poison released.
Yes, this is the kind of thing that regularly plays out in my head. No, you shouldn’t be concerned for me either. You see there are (like the mirrors) many different aspects of this that really do sum up my world view. We are similar to the cat inside a box. Driven by fear and insecurity. Without out a real knowledge of what’s beyond our reasoning of anything immeasurable or observable. Distorted. Isolated. Removed from the true nature of our world, it’s cosmos, and a healthy perspective on exactly how ignorant we really are on a universal level. As a society, we know 2 things with all certainty; we live (cat) and we die (poison). Only do we really even know that? What if this is merely some instance of whatever animates (cosmic life) finding itself in a super-position? What if it is then diverging as it is being observed not simply in one instance. but both simultaneously (mirrors again)? The question of what is observing come into play. I think maybe its reality itself, but I digress. We simply just don’t know and anyone who says they do is just full of shit. No matter the level of science involved, at this point: it is still just mental masturbation.
Any working “universal” theory is a bust. No dice. What about on a cosmic level? Here we have some grasp of different principles and ‘laws’. There is still an air of primitiveness to it, in my assessment. We have 6 senses in which we can exact and analyze any type of ‘knowing’. Our proximity and access seem to be the biggest obstacles in real advancement. Until such a time as we can move closer to proper examination; I just don’t see us moving beyond that, except by painstaking fractal to fractal. Cosmic Kindergarteners.
The Three Quotes
“The world as we find it is undeniably adversarial. Or, in other words, undeniably Satanic.”-Jason King – Post Modern Satanism
“When a mind is enlightened, it casts shadows onto the subconscious. Truly the more enlightened the mind, the darker the shadows we find.”-T.C. Downey – I, Devil (right here)
I won’t devote a great deal of time regurgitating King’s philosophical workings. I recognize his salient gleaning of this characteristic of our world in the above quote from Post Modern Satanism. Seemingly there is a constant competition for resource and survival. There are simple examples like several closely rooted plants which are competing for nutrient, pollination, soil, sunlight, and water. This is further rigorously tested by things like insect infestations, climatic conditions, fires, mold, moss, people, and whatever other things I’m forgetting to list. There are so many phenomenal examples present in our worldscape; you couldn’t possibly list them all and remain sane. King loved to use the “lion and the gazelle”, I think because it could be over simplified and still hold weight as ‘the‘ example. It would seem the more we look at the compounded environmental difficulties faced by any organism on this planet; the more that seem to factor in. There can be no doubt that nature is in fact against itself. Undeniable? You bet. Satanic?
In that sense, Satan is the king of this world! This easily becomes a realization, and then immediately is followed by doubt. Because it is hard to face up to reality. The notion that literally everything is out to get us, comes with denial, paranoia, and a myriad psychological mechanisms. Quickly one forgets that the odds are stacked against us, and those things which remain in existence today; do so in defiance of the natural worldly order. Kind of inspiring to me. A nice little balancer to a rather nihilistic overture. Nature has its system of balances. To this affect, it seems necessary for a heavily destructive tendency to aid in the preservation of the whole. This comes across as shear chaos at first glance; observable however is the emergent order from within.
Clearly we have fooled ourselves into believing that our ‘intellect’ somehow sets us apart from the natural worldly order. These days people must feel alien to this worldly order. How can they not? We have rampant menticide and an inflated sense of self-entitlement that is contrasted with restrictive pushes for passivity and compliance; let us just say it is obvious world war 3 is going to be a global killer. How can it not be? Free-range capitalism has saturated every aspect of life with corruption and distortion. I used to be one of those guys who thinks “democracy = freedom”. Now that I am older, I recognize that that statement couldn’t be farther from the truth.
All democracy does is allow the despicable and unworthy to manipulate and further distort the masses. While we are busy playing our oversized Monopoly TM game, it is obvious we are missing more critical events on a global scale. We fail to look at them in any honest or objective manner. For those that might actually be honest and objective; we are forced to hold a heavy skepticism, for they could be doing so with financially tinted lens. Anyone arguing the merits of any particular ‘sciences’ had better be the far most expert in their field, or sit the fuck down. I don’t care where you are getting your information from, these facts remain. People lie. All the time. Governments lie. No surprise there. Spin is an ancient craft that has been honed and perfected since its inception. The Sheeple (mundanes) love them for it.
Recently the point was made to me that what society is lacking is any true sense of patriotism. To that I had to agree, but I posited that the body of governments should take more pride in their people. You see any relationship, should it be harmonious, is a two way street. Give AND take.
“This is not a matter of compromises or adaptations. The power of a new Middle Ages is needed. A change, interior as well as exterior, of barbaric purity is required. Philosophy, “culture”, everyday politics: no more of all that. It is not a matter of shifting to the other side of this bed of agony. It is a matter of finally waking up, and standing on one’s feet.”-Julius Evola
News Flash! You are not simply entitled to be a live. This natural worldly order does NOT owe a thing to you. In fact, most of you should be put to death. If for no other reason, because you arrogantly assume the entitlement. To further complicate the issue, not only do you think you are entitled, but you are of the opinion that your entitlement is just; whereas another’s is ludicrous. From one side of your face you cry about the injustices of society, and from the other you are equally as dishonourable and contriving. Eager to step over the wake of carnage to receive your metaphorical kudos. Where have all the heroics gone? Have we lost the drive to push ourselves to the highest versions of self? Why has the mantra of “For king and country” been replaced with the motto “live to fight another day”? Do you see it? Can you comprehend? There is glory in dying for ‘higher’ principles, and a deep felt appreciation from those for which you fight. Dedication and loyalty are quickly slipping into the hallowed crypts of antiquity. Where is your pride in heritage and tradition? What is it in a highschool or college diploma? A mediocre job, where most of your focus is making money or worse a name for somebody else?
Mankind is so emancipated from the natural worldly order, and this makes it seem inevitable that we will face extinction. How could we not? We cannot possibly understand the value of life, if we are not willing to die for it. There is no way to grasp the preciousness of enlightenment, if we cannot embrace the darkness behind it. With that for each egalitarian neutering that socially arises; nature will send a brutal killer to cleanse its palette. So for this, I truly am sorry to disappoint you. None the less, I shall endure!
-Beast Xeno (edited on 08/09/21 to improve conceptualization and readability)
The Sinister Creed
Satan in particular and the Dark Gods in general are a means to self-fulfillment and self-
Only by journeying through the darkness within us and without can we attain self-divinity and
thus fulfil the potentiality of our existence.
Our rites, ceremonies and practices are all life-affirming, and show us the ecstasy of existence
and the self-overcoming of the true Adept.
We are feared because we defy and seek to know and thus understand. We rejoice in living: in all
its pleasures but most particularly in its possibilities. We thus extend the frontiers of evolution
while others sleep or cry.
We detest all that enervates and would rather die than submit to anyone or anything – this pride is
the pride of Satan, and Satan is a symbol of our defiance and a sign of our life-enhancing energy.
Others see our way of living and our way of dying and are afraid.
When we hate we hate openly and with arrogance, and when we love, we love with a passion to
match this arrogance: always mindful never to love anyone so much that we cannot see them die,
for death is a natural changing of energies.
We prepare – through our magick and our ways of living – for the Age of Fire (the Aeon of the
Dark Gods) which is to come, when we elitist few shall reach out toward the stars and the galaxies and the new challenges they will bring.
Our way is difficult and dangerous and is for the few who can truly defy the matrix of illusions of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ – that stifle the potentiality of our being.
What does not kill us, makes us stronger.Codex Saerus – The Order of Nine Angles
As the world around us violently changes, I am reminded of the lobster in the boiling pot. The rich have become nothing but richer, and the poor are only poorer. The masses are so caught up in the little manufactured achievements bestowed upon them. So blinded; so stupid. Men are so emasculated and women are no longer truly venerated. Gender has become something only identified with, and is no longer celebrated or even taboo. One might think to themselves “what strides of social equality have been achieved”, but to me that begs the question; what did it cost us?
I am a person who rarely apologizes, but if any of what I am saying offends you; I am truly sorry. You see, I harbor no phobias in this topic and if it should sound as such; well tough shit, all you will get is an apology from me for it. I am all about becoming who you truly are. If this means you are something other than the once “societal standard”; by all means embrace it. Keep in mind though, I am of the old school of thought; where we do not peek over our neighbor’s fences. So when I speak on these matters, understand that I am not coming from a place of bigoted mind. The only reason, I have chosen to bring this up is, because I believe we are being robbed of something essential and this demonstrates it adequately.
What I mean is this, when I was a small child, life hit me with a series of unfortunate events. I was first stricken sick as an infant. That left me with a massive hearing loss. A short time later, my father passed away in an accident. This left my mother extremely poor and emotionally in despair. She was pregnant at the time of his passing. I went through more than several years of abuse at the hands of my step-family. Mental, physical, and sexual; its like Prego “it’s in there”. By the time I hit the ages of 11-13, my somewhat shy and self-conscious demeanor had culminated into a seemingly magnetic target for bullying. This is the part of the story, where someone should have come to my rescue, and it isn’t. No hero came, no one stuck up for me. The school didn’t care, the police gave even less of a shit.
What transpired instead was a cosmic test of mettle. You see I was born determined. Each event listed I overcame; I rose above it. By the age of 14, I knew who I truly was and nothing was going to hold me down. None of the disadvantages I inherited, would make me take a knee. I had taken on the mantra of, “Why? Because fuck you, that’s why!”. I am my own champion. A warrior within my own rite! The bullies, I bullied them. The abuse I suffered, I let it be the kindling of my internal fire. The deafness, you would have no idea it is there if I did not say so.
Understand this now, I AM NOT SPECIAL! There is nothing about me beyond my defiance and determination that made it possible to overcome. Which is what finally brings me to the impetus and thrust of this entry. “Only by journeying through the darkness within us and without can we attain self-divinity and thus fulfil the potentiality of our existence.” The Sinister Creed gives us 9 points with a singular energy, the thrust to defy and overcome.
It used to be that people of different sexual orientations had to undergo a very personal quest of self-discovery and self-empowerment. So I think, those that did so will understand where I am coming from with this. It should not just be handed to you. You will miss out on everything that truly gives self power and strength. Sure there are those that will succumb and fail, not all are worthy of truly living (in my views, not all are worthy of life). Each must pass the tests of living to be worthy of doing so. Those we coddle, we do them no service. We may love them, but we must be willing to watch them die. This is the Law of Nature, it always has been. This is a cosmic revelation, yet has been no kept secret.
So in that, what do I mean by cosmic revelation? When we look into nature what we see is constantly repeating patterns. Fractals if you will. What happens on a microscopic level, seems to also happen on larger and larger scales. The Law of Nature is no different. In the same way, that a seedling planted on the shadyside of a tree has to struggle and overcome to survive; so must we endure to survive.
With all of the solar storm activity in the news lately, it should also be apparent that the same condition exists on that level. There is in fact, a delicate balance struck in nature. Some of which we can see and comprehend, the rest though the pattern remains elusive.
To be continued…
What is the Insidious Way? Where did it come from? How does it fit in with the Order of Nine Angles and Satanism? These are questions that are valid, yet can be hard to answer, because of the nature of it. First we must understand the word’s meaning and where it comes from.
1a: having a gradual and cumulative effect : SUBTLEMerriam-Webster Dictionary
1b: of a disease : developing so gradually as to be well established before becoming apparent
2a: awaiting a chance to entrap : TREACHEROUS
2b: harmful but enticing : SEDUCTIVE
Insidious comes from a Latin word for “ambush” (insidiae), which is fitting, as this word often carries the meanings “deceitful,” “stealthy,” or “harmful in an imperceptible fashion.” The first two meanings may be applied to people or things (“an insidious enemy,” “an insidious plot”), while the last is usually applied to things (“insidious problems,” “insidious sexism”), in particular to the gradual progress of a disease (“an insidious malignancy”)Merriam-Webster Dictionary
I have read other etymology suggesting that it is rooted in the Latin word “Insidere” meaning to lie and wait for. I will leave the authenticity and factualness of that to David Myatt, if he should ever choose to digress upon it. Through that same action, and in the same way, I am beginning to talk about what it really is.
Let me explain what I mean. You see about 13 years ago, I began studying the Fourth Way as was brought forth by G.I. Gurdjieff. Coincidentally at the same time, became interested in what was being put out about Anton Long and the Order of Nine Angles, by Chloe352. What I found was an unconscious interconnection, an inner resonance if you will. Though it had not quite surfaced or begun to crystallize at that point. There would need to be a few more events before the idea of the Insidious Way came into my head.
Before I get into that though, ( I promise I will explain what I meant soon) a little background on my path to here. In the middle of my seventh grade year, we were assigned a book report. This book report was different than any I had had before, as it was the first one I had to do on a book of my own choosing. Now I was brought up Midwest Baptist or Calvary Baptist, whatever it is that you call it. However at this point in my life, I had become completely dissatisfied with it. Initially I had tried to look into the religion of my ancestors, Druidism, but what I found out was that there are no true accounts of it. Now in all fairness, as to not discount the possibility, it is completely possible that a few bloodlines have aurally passed down the traditions of old. I believe my great-grandfather tried to do so with me as a child. But I digress as I am straying.
I chose to do my report on I Ching. In the process my first exposure to another religion was Taoism. In Taoism, it is taught that sometimes the best effort is no effort at all. Patience, like the spider in his web, can often reveal the clearest easiest path to attainment. Then so in the same way, that I will wait for David Myatt to translate the root of the word, we see the very first seed planted in my mind.
Gurdjieff gave the next seed planted. The concept of Self-Remembering showed me that there was a way to silence the mind while remaining in motion. Insight could be gleaned from simply being in the state of conscious observation. He also introduced me to the concept that there are no great mysteries. That all ideas eventually become known by all, because of the nature of our species. If not in that way, then by it intuitively rising up in the mind of another.
Though somewhat out of chronological order in its placement, it is important now to talk about what I call fertile ground. Chaos Magic and my own purely Satanic ethos provide the rich soil for which this idea has grown. I fell in love with the devil long before I ever read LaVey’s “Magnum Opus”. In truth though the TSB mirrored for me a great deal of my already developing character. Yet I could not simply accept the cookie cutter “Satanity” of the CoS. So I did not pass go and they did not collect $200.
During highschool, I was an avid fan and partaker of recreational drugs. Particularly LSD and other hallucinogenics. My interest in the Occult was further nurtured by the heathenistic pagan hippie commune I bought my psychedelics from. After a dozen or so invitations to join them in ritual, I decided it might be fun to do so after ingesting some mescaline. For a time this was a steady occurrence.
As the years went on in my life, my focus, turned to Chaos Magick. I still had an interest in exploring new ideologies as they presented themselves to me. This all culminated and came to a head sometime in late 2008. I began involvement with The Cult of Cthulhu. Chaos Magick, Esotericism, Satanism, and The Fourth Way all finally fermented into fertile ground.
At the same time, Chloe was bringing more and more interesting perspectives to light on various subject matter being discussed within the circles I frequented, and at the same time consistently pointing back to the O9A. Ideas like Praxis and Wyrd instantly grabbed my interest. I had read everything I could get my hands on.
Some discussions with Chloe about concept of a memeplex, along with the more and more frequently occurring arrival of various Nexions, had begun to really hold my interest. What I found most fascinating was the scope of variety and permeance of each occurrence. I began to know the Tree of Wyrd, just as complete strangers become familiar with each other.
The O9A by its own ethos, is in fact, just as insidious as it is sinister. By the simple fact that the goal is to affect Aeonic Change, and that it is understood this happens gradually over the course of time. Through the use of Aeonic Magick and by whatever other methods it’s initiates employ, this aligns my goals with their own. Though once again, I reject the cookie cutter version of initiation. To be quite honest though, I’m almost positive that this is not considered heretical by the “inner circle”.
So I guess I should finally answer the question of what is the Insidious Way? In short, the Insidious Way is the belief, practice, and understanding that through conscious observation, dark empathy, dedicated study, development of culture, and Sinister strategy, one can overcome the Magian / Puritan and evolve as a being. Becoming Warlock Warriors aka Darkhorses. These Masters of the Self are Alchemists of Anarchy and Sultans of Subterfuge, seeking the frontline of the coming season.
What follows will seem rigid as I codify the Darkhorse Klan. However I expect to be challenged. I expect attempts made to usurp. As in nature, the struggle for alpha must remain present. In the same tradition, just as all things occurring naturally before this brotherhood; there is a season. When one season ends, another season has already begun.
I like to talk about time in a more organic fashion. In my mind, we try too hard to ascribe an artificial set of properties upon naturally occurring phenomenon. Time is no exception. There is no distinct marking between autumn and winter, nor winter and spring. One slowly fades in as the other slowly fades out. It is only in the height of a season, that you can be sure which season you are in.
I am talking about the most basic understanding of seasons. That being the passing of an indefinite amount of time, which is denoted by a specific set of characteristics. It can be understood that I am describing the coming into and going out of something specific. In the case of Darkhorse Klan, it could be our aims, influences, or methods. As only the strongest and most beneficial of anything should prevail. For one of the earmarks of true honour is dedication to the longevity and sanctity of your own.
Long ago, there was a season where these values were cherished abroad. A time when character was crafted in the individual from the very beginning. Things like clan, country, and honour were embraced and held high. As I said in the beginning of this, the past is gone. Yet that season can come again.
I admire the Koryos. Adolescents tasked with forging their transformation from boy to man. Seeking to connect to the primal and often brutal natural order. Donning the hide of the hunter beast spirit which they seek symbiosis with. Not simply the mimicry of the technique and prowess of these great beasts, but the merging with its metaphysical psychology and life force. It must have been quite a sight to behold, men ferocious and wild often consumed with bloodlust.
Fearless warriors and hunters that were supposedly forced to be an outcast of their clan/tribe. Still they chose to be the protectors of their people. Most were indoctrinated back into the clan/tribe, after passing whatever tests had been set out before them. Still some found their place in this world, and chose never to came back. They had forged their totem.
The importance of a totem is lost in our modern translations. Often seeming as an archaic and inferior understanding, so much gnosis lost. Each Darkhorse should venture to adopt and connect to a totem. This connection will serve as conduit for our transmutation. A true alchemy sought for evolution of our whole being.
To truly fulfill our 9A:O, we must seek not only a personal transformation, but a societal transformation. To achieve this it is difficult to imagine what must be done. The most direct line I can see, is a cleansing and rebirth. The means of such action are far beyond my reach or the reach of probably all that will read this. We all know genocide is a very dirty word. One that most people cannot condone and most certainly cannot imagine.
Fortunately as the old expression goes, there is more than one way to skin a fox. Selective culling has been employed throughout history to remove undesirable elements in our world. Yet when we speak on the level of what is deemed human, most are mortified.
If someone asked me to cast my vote upon the idea of an annual Purge, (yes I’m talking about the concept as put forth in the movies bearing the same title) I would incline to cast my vote in the affirmative. Even though that would place me and mine in jeopardy for that time, my answer would remain the same. This makes me a bit sad that it would, but I am so disgusted by the condition in which we exist.
To quote the Joker in the 1989 film Batman, “This town needs an enema!”. An end to the neutering and pacification of society as a whole. The rooting out and decimation of the dishonorable, ignorant, and unaccountable pestilence we call mankind. To me it is clear that we have stifled our own course of evolution and some action must be taken.
I have always held a deep admiration for various organizations such as the Hashshashin, Yakuza, and China’s Heaven and Earth Society. The ability to tend to and regulate your own within is beyond admirable. The ability to operate on a clandestine level is even more so. So I have sought to emulate such brotherhoods. It is for this reason that the true name of the Darkhorse Klan, is known only by 9 currently and will only be revealed to those who prove loyalty and solidarity. For the wise, a simple clue; keep your circles small, from this you maintain order.
The past is most certainly gone. Like this moment as it’s passing. For every thing there is a season, and as the season ends, may our season be already underway. I look to the alchemical season with hope and conviction.
I think I have covered a great deal of ground in these three parts. I’m certain a few revisions will surface over time. For now though this will work.
– Beast Xeno
Truth is sometimes very much like a barbed wire. There are those that can only handle it in a delicate manner. Those that don’t want anything to do with it. There are some that misjudge it’s strength and cannot appreciate it’s tendency towards eliciting pain. More so, truth, at least objective truth; is a very sinister force.
The truth is fickle and often elusive. In the same way, it is blinding and often ignored. The kind of truth I speak of is not the subjective species we’ve come to embrace. Entire religions have been built on the misapprehension of subjective truths as objective truths.
Buddhism is one such religion. To demonstrate such is as simple as “samsara”. Even if we accept the concept of cylindric life, we are still left with the subjective nature of that as truth. What I mean is, the statement of Life as a cycle of death and rebirth is not verifiable in an empirical sense. Though we can witness things being born and things dying, there is nothing empirical to create a connection between the two.
However there is a certainty in that statement. A very sinister certainty. Everything dies and if it has life it eventually meets its death. That can be verified empirically. To that understanding, I present you with the first of the Darkhorse’s Sinister Certainties.
You see certainty is not held abstractly and requires that you draw from practical experience. Praxis if you will. Certainty comes from repeatedly experiencing the same result and being able to recognize that you will in fact continue to do so. It is not an abstract concept, instead it is a glaring practical recognization.
Another of Darkhorse’s Sinister Certainties is that Everyone is slave to something. That is that everyone bends to serve something. It is by our attachments that we come to this place of servitude. Even the Buddhist monk holds attachment. Just the attachment to the idea of non-attachment should illustrate sufficiently. I know it probably looks like I’m picking on Buddhists, however that’s just not the case. One of my favorite thinkers is in fact one.
The Insidious Way brings an understanding that these attachments are better defined as influences. When correctly observed in this way, there is a recognization that you cannot be free from influence. All you can really do is choose what, how much, or simply how; you are influenced. Power is gained through learning to traffic in influence. Which brings me to another Sinister Certainty. Influence is the purest currency.
Just as you would mind your acquiring of, investing of, saving of, and spending of money; you must also mind influence in this manner. Here we come to a place where we understand that these Sinister Certainties that I have been talking about are primal influences. I choose the term primal over meta because they speak deeper than the rational mind. They speak to the very core of our being.
These statements of ominous foreshadowing are in fact terrifying to most. They boast of how easily something horrifying can unfold in front of you. You cannot hold influence over everything, but anything can hold influence over you. Which brings me to the last of the Sinister Certainties I wish to talk about tonight; Cosmically we are insignificant.
A comet does not care if you have accepted Jesus in your heart. A supernova is not concerned with your karma. For that matter, the planet Earth does not care if you can breathe.
These are not finite understandings. They are not some rigid system of supposed enlightenment. Quite the opposite, they represent the bleakness and the void. A literal Endarkenment. A disillusioning of falsities such as hope and Nirvana. I would ask my readers that have absorbed what I am putting forward to comment some other possible Sinister Certainties. This is to be done for the purpose of learning your own truths.
When I think of the Elements the first one that comes to mind is water. Water is very much like Darkhorse. It is unassuming and so often overlooked. There is an almost unnatural calming effect that so many experience in its presence. It is as if the stories of old, told of the Siren’s song, were simply a metaphor for the mesmerizing trance that the water holds. As deep as the trenches of the ocean floor go, so does this great teacher’s lessons.
In as many forms as we can find water taking; we can find an equal portion of transformations owed to it. Water is the giver of life and the unspeakable horror of the lives it has taken. On a Planetary level, it is representative of the inner mind and subconsciousness. Some of its chief hallmarks being adaptive, soothing, fluid, corrosive, expanding, and overcoming.
None can deny the power that this element holds. How quickly it can shift from a calm serenity, to a swelling chaos of certain peril. On an Earthly level, it is a perfect balance of tri-state mastery (hot-tepid-cold). Seemingly able to summon hybrid variations of these states. One would be wise to court Mercury’s companion. At the surface, it should be seen as reflective. Bearing in mind, the deeper we go the more mysteries it holds. No wonder why in Alchemy it is denoted by the downward triangle.
The Slyman works to imitate the properties of water element. Seeking to absorb the prowess and mysteriousness. Minding the great wisdoms the waters hold. Not just in seeking your own level, but in your own tri-state mastery.
To this effect, the (one of the) fundamental task(s) of the Initiate Grade of the Order of Nine Angles’ Sevenfold Path termed “Insight Role” (once referred to by Mindfux as Agency); is revered by Darkhorse as essential to development. This practice of shapeshifting is both insightful and extremely useful to our ends.
I am not sure I agree with A. Long about the duration of your first insight role being a minimum of 18 months, but perhaps there is some aspect I’m overlooking. I would tend to think a build up to that undertaking would be useful, as learning to hold a shape takes a tremendous effort. Still I am a strong proponent of the notion “if its not broken, don’t fix it” and this is definitely not broken.
SHTF Preppers (Shit-Hits-The-Fan Preppers) should be flocking by the thousands to achieve this; as this is the ultimate “Grey Man” training. Changing your appearance and being able to move in and out of different scenarios undetected is only effective in a short term event. They assume they can make it to their “bug-out” location. It is also worth mentioning that in a true SHTF situation this is reactive and not proactive. Anyway I digress.
If I have failed in any way to demonstrate the powers held by this Elemental; one needs only go to Wikipedia and search “List of water deities” and stand in awe of broad scope and antiquity of its worship. For me, being of Irish Celtic descent, its resonance echoes of a heritage I will never truly get to understand. I refuse to buy into the “neo-druid” horseshit which reeks of Crowley’s golden dawn with sprinkles of wicca and flakes of shaman spice.
As a boy my great-granddad used to tell me old folklore from our homeland. Tales of fairies, warriors, and gods were his favorite to wax. There was always a water connection. So much of a connection that my family’s coat of arms distinctly has 3 sea creatures on it.
Before I stray to far from the thrust of this writing. I wanted to glean another association to water I have made, and that is to blood (more specifically bloodlines). Obvious I guess, to most maybe, but in the same way that water can be used for dilution, it can also be used for purification. To further affect it is also key to transmutation.
The process of making crack-cocaine is one excellent example of such purification and transmutation. Three very simple ingredients when processed together can take weak powdered cocaine and make it reemerge; both hardened and more potent. This of course takes place in the first ingredient water.
During times of antiquity, a tactic was used to assimilate a conquered people (thus ensuring compliance) without necessarily totally enslaving them. To maintain “total occupation” is an extremely expensive and laborsome endeavor. By simply killing off the undesirable components (in this case the warrior caste) and inter-breeding with select components; you can create a linear-sense of loyalty and submission. Halfbreeds (with desirable traits) can then be further bred back into the desired pool. Perhaps adding a physical or mental ability not present (or perhaps weaker) before.
This is not unlike the process of making crack-cocaine. As it is a formula for the breaking down, purification, and reemergence of greater intensity; it is yet another stellar example of water’s transmutative abilities. As much as water is one the great teachers; so is it one of the great tests. Though we require it to survive; it is something of a feat to survive it. The necessity to do so is the catalyst for us to become as adaptive and persistent as water itself is.
So in closing, I will implore those of the Darkhorse to be as insidious as water is. Study it, work with it, revere it, and you will unlock the secrets bore in the depths of it. The Mother, Destroyer, Nurturer, and Sorceress that is eternal. She is worshipped throughout the history of mankind. She encourages us be silent and subtle; to be formless and adaptive; to be entrancing and yet treacherous. This writing is but a shallow gleaning of a gnosis so rich and available to any who choose to undergo it. One cannot move through water fearlessly, without knowing the depths of it. As Bruce Lee once said “Be water, my friend”.
Everything that exists in this universe develops its suchness, quality, and nature because of its Environment. Time is on the ONA’s side. The Future neither belongs to the Right or Left. It belongs to Violence, War, Hate, Competition, and Human death and casualties the likes of which we have never seen: the Future belongs to Human Nature. It’s the Kali Yuga after all. Agios O World War 3!
To recognize the need for the destruction of puritan ideology is indicative of wisdom. A smart man sees things for what they really are; dishonorable, oppressive; literally infested with hubris. A. Long in his practical wisdom has charged those of a specific character to presence the sinister. This is to be accomplished through particular methods with precise aim to affect Aeonic Change. To that end; Let he that has the ear, hear the words of Tsun Tzu “All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer, but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved”. Let this be the thrust to which I Aim.
As I have stated before “Darkhorse is not a descriptor, rather a prescriptor. It is neither the map, nor the terrain; rather it is the skills to scale and survey the terrain. A developed ‘eye for detail’ and the faculty to correlate the map to the terrain; thereby reaching your aim“. Aeonic Change is the only worthy Aim to the Slyman. Only change can bring about our evolution. Adaptation is a measure of intelligence in the tri-sense of the word, and by that I mean mind/body/spirit (please excuse the laymen’s terms, I’m trying not to get lost in the abstractions). To achieve this end, I bring forth Darkhorse.
Darkhorse sees our situation for what it truly is; the proverbial David and Goliath. Like the story, the odds seem insurmountable, but with the correct action/actions the giant will topple. There are multiple tactics and combinations of tactics one could employ to do so. I will only outline and briefly discuss a few.
Permeation – This is the same tactic used by the Catholic Church during the Age of Discovery. It is a play on Tsun Tzu’s “moral law”. This is where you weave your ideology into the very fabrics of your enemy’s culture, beliefs, and society. It is done in such a way as to infect the solidarity of their opposition. I have witnessed this strategy being mostly effectively used by the O9A already over the past 10 years or so. Chloe352 is, in my opinion, the most effective employer of this strategy. You only need to go to the O9A site now and see how and where she’s operating. She openly discusses or leaves clues in her writings. In the Insidious Way (ISW) this is the Principle of Earth Element. One cannot cultivate a garden in soil that is already tainted.
Division/Isolation – This is the tactic that is so often used in the most notable military campaigns of History. This is the classic divide and conquer tactic. Division can be accomplished through a variety of means. Creating tensions between any type of diversification already present within the body of your enemy. Psychological warfare at its finest. By severing connection to each other and possibly the outside world, in such a way as to give the impression that the enemy stands by itself. This is effective because it tends to create the feelings of panic and suffocation. In the ISW this is the Principle of Air Element. One cannot breathe freely when the air is restricted.
Exhaustion – By draining the resources and therefore the vitality of our enemy, we are quickly able to tire them out. At the same time, we are able to strengthen and fortify ourselves. Tsun Szu says “Hence a wise general makes a point of foraging on the enemy. One cartload of the enemy’s provisions is equivalent to twenty of one’s own, and likewise a single picul of his provender is equivalent to twenty from one’s own store.” In the ISW this the Principle of Fire Element. One cannot be revitalized from ash and cinder.
These are merely the cursory overviews of definition, correlation, and use of such tactics in which themselves hold an esoteric fortune to those with the aptitude to make use of them. Let them be a tri-folded beacon for the kindred, for the Darkhorse sees there are in fact distinctly nine of them. 9 Worlds, 9 Rites, 9 Octaves, 9 Elements, 9 Avatars, 9 Archetypes, 9 Angles, and on and on; down the rabbit hole we go.
The Rites of Darkhorse
“For I incline toward the view that whether we do this is inextricably bound toAn Interview with Anton Long (NYC 2015)
how we understand our current predicament on Earth and thus whether we
can free ourselves from the constraints that so bind us now: abstractions,
politics, religions, a lack of self-knowing, a lack of self-honesty, dishonour,
and such personal egoistic desires as so often still subsume us. Which
constraints the experiential Seven Fold Way (the ‘physis sorcery’) of the O9A
was designed to break, containing as that esoteric Way does a necessary,
human, enantiodromia – a melding of the masculous with the muliebral – and
presencing as it does, as those who reach the stage of Internal Adept
discover, the essence of culture.”-A. Long 2015 (From an interview that “Rachael Stirling” had with A. Long)
It is providence that this, gem of a PDF (An Interview With Anton Long), has surfaced in the midst of me working on this essay. A. Long’s statement shows an eerie reflection of the very essence of Darkhorse. Perhaps that is because there is an internal synchronicity held between two that have honestly put the Work in. It may just be the admiration I have held for the man since I first came upon the curious occult entity referred to as O9A. I tend to believe the former; as most of the narrative has slowly manifested in different aspects (evidenced in my poetry from roughly 30 years ago to today) of my path. No matter the reasons, all things have resulted in the coming practice and Klan.
I have resolved to consciously put daily effort into this blog so that I might attract the likeminded or kindred. Should my words resonate, and you feel a kindred connection to the Darkhorse; you can contact me at email@example.com. Be aware though I am not seeking online fantasy play pals. I am looking for those with the mind and spirit to Work in the real world. I will relist the 9A:O below.
Our 9A:O – The Nine Angled Objectives of Darkhorse Klan (DhK)
1. To seek resonance, to build strength within.
2. To absorb, embody, and evolve the Insidious Way.
3. To tap our potential as Darkhorse and gain supranatural advantages in achieving our Aims.
4. To decimate morality. To reject duality/balance as some higher attainment.
5. To be freed from prison A (mental liberation), and become a Deep One.
6. To endeavor as creators, manifestors of living breathing art.
7. To see “real world” manifestations of the Klan into fruition. Such as continued legal status, real Lodges and monetary growth. To begin the corrosion of prison B (societal liberation)
8. To construct something that lasts of the self beyond death; both internally and externally.
9. To Awaken the A:O.
There are nine Rites in the ISW; Awakening, Heresy, Transmutation, Creation, Mayhem, Sinister, Undertaking, Havoc, and Insidious; they are all interconnected and must be worked in succession as the notes in a scale do. I will get to them in time, but for the moment there is already a great deal to digest. I have been working on this post for far too long as it is. I will leave this enneagram as food for thought in closing. As it shows 9 Rites and 9 Archetypes that I associate to them.
Eight years had passed when I reopened this old WordPress. For eight years I have only Worked and manifested offline and only for my immediate benefit. I have to apologize for that, because the truth is I was discouraged by the anonymous-word-soup from those I admired and rampant sycophancy of those I abhor. There are/were those I remain in communication with. Even they are from time to time and lesser as time passes. You see outside the interwebs I don’t have to use any particular set of methods to influence the current to achieve my aims. People are sheep and I recognize this, even the smartest that I interact with still can be sheered with regularity.
Coming back here now, I am almost overwhelmed. However the A:O call to me and it is clear my work here isn’t finished. There is so very much that I simply just intuit it can at times be daunting trying to break things down for ease of reading. You would think being a father that I would have mastered this type of discourse, but there are two factors which disrupt that theory. The first is that my offspring are of me and since birth have been around me, so they understand me and even to some extent think as I do. The other thing is, and I keep this in the forefront of my mind always; you my reader are not children. Hailing from all walks of life and with different degrees of intuition and intelligence. Some are more initiated and others so mundane.
Experience has taught me not to underestimate or overvalue, and so I get lost in a labyrinth of my own design. Simply trying to balance the totality of my gnosis and communicating it effectively. I find myself jealous of writers like Chloe352 and my late comrade Ego Diabolus, they seem to effortlessly put their ideas out there effectively. I realize this is of course a healthy mixture of natural talent and practice as all artwork is. Communication is an artform, perhaps it is the root artform, as all types of art are trying to communicate something to the receptor.
Perhaps this is why I’m drawn back to this artificial disconnect (Interwebs). It is possible with a daily effort and the revealing of all aspects of myself that I might learn to be a more effective communicator. Before I kept different aspects of myself compartmentalized. In hindsight I’ve taken away some of the tools I possess. In effect, giving myself a ridiculous handicap.
My aim has never deterred as you’ll see in poetry I wrote 20-30 years ago. I am singularly focused on sparking change. I know now and have always known this battle will be fought liberating one mind at a time. This is why I have brought back Eminent Mind, DhK, and Beast Xeno. For 30 years I have walked the Lefthand Path, explored the conscious and subconscious alike. For 30 years my deeds in real life have matched my core principals. For all the ritual and practice there has to be one thing that kindles your awakening. So this is for you. I see your prison and am trapped there too. I know your shackles, for I have also felt their weight. It is so much easier a path to just follow the program, but it is empty and hollow. It is forsaken and meaningless.
Referred to by Lovecraft as the “Great Old Ones” and the “Outer Gods”, I have come to know them as The Ancient Ones. A fictional pantheon created by Lovecraft to build atmosphere in his tales, according to our tradition, the A:O are the primeval archetypes of Aethyr. HPL, by means of his stricken health, may have developed a naturally occurring deep esoteric resonance. Lovecraft inadvertently tapped into something ancient and primordial; a pervasive metaphysical essence at the beginning of all Aeons, which exists outside the physical plane. That same essence began revealing itself by manifesting unspeakable cosmic horrors in the dreams of Lovecraft.
In mankind’s early days, the A:O were nameless gods. Adepts came and went as frequently as the decades passed, each one ascribing a name(s) to the attributes recognized. Each passing generation, trying to find a better way to communicate what the A:O was. Our species lacked the capacity to describe the essence before and within them. At first we could only give it relations to elements in nature which appeared to be supranatural. When we finally mastered the art of anthropomorphization, we had all but forgotten what we were first trying to describe. An essence which was the catalyst that caused man to evolve and one day take our place among the Deep Ones; astral beings transcending dimensional existence as living conduit from which the A:O could return.
The A:O was lulled into a death-like sleep and forgotten by the world. New Gods, that is Lesser Gods; had come to take the place of the cosmic horrors, we had once so revered. Somewhere deep inside the fragments of our being, there is a residual memory of the terrors of mutagenic transformation; but we have long since faded from awareness. As the LG demanded blind obedience to its paradoxical morality, out of fear for our supposedly immortal soul. Mankind fell from our connection to that metaphysical essence (magnetic center). Yet, farther from the true nature of our being.
To the A:O we had become insignificant and irrelevant. Once ripe with so much promise and potential, we had spoiled and rotted away in the once fertile soil from whence we had grown. The LG had poisoned our prana with morality, slavery, and suffering, so that it would be suitable to sustain them. So the Darkhorse’s Work since its inception, has been focused on awakening that resonance of metaphysical essence (magnetic center). To do this we would need to work in a particular direction, and in a particular fashion.
This magnetic center can be thought of as the prisoner part of our self which is emaciated and weak. It cannot live freely. When we begin the Work, it is clear that the cage imprisoning our magnetic center is unlocked. There is no real barrier preventing us from escaping.
Unfortunately, we are far too pathetic to live outside this cage. In order to survive, we must become stronger and more potent. Therefore, to be nourished, our essence (magnetic center) should be observed from the outside occasionally at first, and then with greater frequency. Gaining knowledge of what is happening in the world. The movement between this knowledge and our essence (magnetic center) is called Self-Remembering. Self-Remembering is energy creating tremendous positive (to our benefit) change. Essence is grown stronger and more potent with proper nutrition (the correct work within our centers) and specific impressions of the world. We then can determine the correct action to take based upon the information, experience, and work. Finally leaving the cage, at that point; that our magnetic center can be called the “Real I”.
“Real I” takes over showing us that mundane (puritan) life is not an important thing. Nor is it our optimal focus. Puritan life only gives us the basics and that is if we are fortunate. Our Great Work, on the other hand, is central to becoming more Conscious. When the Work becomes our focus, we are making evolutionary progress towards an aeonic perspective; towards awakening the A:O.
It is important that the reader acknowledge that there is a particular phenomenon being discussed here. Strip away anything thought to be extraordinary, fantastic, or supernatural; something still exists that is undeniable. This essence being discussed seems to be something which can exist outside of our otherwise biomechanical nature. Throughout history you can see one religion after the next all focused in one way or the other upon it. Science can only sort of measure it and only partially explain it. It is one of the chief mysteries that have puzzled thinkers and mystics since the beginning of this Aeon.
Theistic and gnostic relate it to the concept of a “soul” or “spirit”. Maslow labelled it as “self-actualization” and theorized that it could be cultivated to one step even higher. The attainment of a “transpersonal” state. Still none of them seem to wholly capture what, all of us seem to be aware of. That “thing”, that alien essence, in which they all seem to point to; That is The A:O. That is what we must endeavor to awaken. This is the Great Work of the Darkhorse Klan Brotherhood (or just simply called “The Brotherhood”).
Still in progress… but worth a preemptive share.
T.C. Downey/Beast Xeno
(Oath of Klan Brotherhood)
I am not Special.
I know not now who I am.
I possess nothing that is original; barren of authenticity.
My ego is a carbon copy; xeroxed from true life force millenia ago.
A persona constructed by basic programming executed by a string of subconscious impulses.
I am an unwitting slave to the puritan ideological environment.
I have been stripped of my honour and robbed of my potential; expected to be compliant.
Truth now has been spoken!
I will now begin to awaken!
I vow to gain back my HONOUR and strengthen my POTENCY!
Embracing to struggle.
Against this I’ll grow stronger.
Begin to reach deeper.
Then act as a Slyman.
I cannot go alone and become free of my prison.
So I am charged to seek out my own kind.
To spark so that they may see a glimpse of light.
Should fortune have it their own struggle will also ignite.
Let this be our bond forged in more than blood.
Freedom and Purpose of ancient days and future nights.
I pledge on my life to rise with Honour and Klan!
Our 9A:O – The Nine Angled Objectives of Darkhorse Klan (DhK)
1. To seek resonance, to build strength within.
2. To absorb, embody, and evolve the Insidious Way.
3. To tap our potential as Darkhorse and gain supranatural advantages in achieving our Aims.
4. To decimate morality. To reject duality/balance as some higher attainment.
5. To be freed from prison A (mental liberation), and become a Deep One.
6. To endeavor as creators, manifestors of living breathing art.
7. To see “real world” manifestations of the Klan into fruition. Such as continued legal status, real Lodges and monetary growth. To begin the corrosion of prison B (societal liberation)
8. To construct something that lasts of the self beyond death; both internally and externally.
9. To Awaken the A:O.
When I sat down today to write; I had it in my mind that I might tackle “Terror” as a subject matter and perhaps set the record straight (from my perspective anyway). As I fumbled around the internet; looking for things that might really hammer my ideas into a fine point. I stumbled across a blog entry which linked one of the most asinine videos I think I have ever seen. To boot, it was being paraded as “logical”. So I’m going to shelve “Terror” for yet another entry, because I just can’t stomach so much hubris in under 15 minutes. To think, my interests were once peeked by the author of this video. Shame on me.
The main topic of this blog entry (posted on December 21st of 2020) was “satan-ism” with the subtopic being “predatory groups of” satan-ism. In which, 3 videos were linked. I naturally selected the one I was interested in; the Order of Nine Angles. The video took place on November 3rd of 2020 (over 45+ days before the blog entry?? wtf??) and lasted just under 15 minutes. I wasn’t 30 seconds in and my eyes were involuntarily rolling into the back of my head. So much fallaciousness in one spot, it is hard to know exactly where to start, but like all things you aren’t sure about; I’ll just start at the beginning.
Before we get going I want to clarify (in case, over the years I have not) a few things. I am not a part of the inner circle of “Old Guard” and have only had interactions with handful of ONA associates. Some may be currently active, some may be in “away mode”, but I have only recently felt the calling once again to rejoin the interwebs. There is Chloe352 who I’ve talked to a great length via e-mail and other digital exchange mediums. I know her the best out of all of them. I met her on MySatan back in 2007 we conversed because of a common interest in Freemasonry and kind of hit it off from that. Since then there has been a flow of ideas and information exchanged. I have never seen her face and maybe heard her voice 1 time. Still the resonance is there, I know her inner-voice so well that I can spot her “sock” accounts from The first sentence posted. There is Ryan, I’m not sure really where I met Ryan or how we began talking via the interwebs, but it has been since just after meeting Chloe352 ( a year or two at most). I respect Ryan and our exchanges have always been mutually beneficial. Once again though no face, no voice, and this time it might take a little while; but I will spot his “socks”. Then there is MIndfux. I first encountered him on “the 600 club” and later on “S.I.N.”. This was around 2008-2010. After a bit of philosophical and political discourse (a private exchange via telephone and a guest appearance(s) on The Ooze), he invited me to work with him and several others I know in his (defunct??) L316 Nexion. Our two agendas and philosophical/political leanings lined up. Even though I AM NOT by nature a joiner; if I think the cause is worthy I will align myself. With L316 the stars were perfectly aligned. Finally Dan Dread who also participated in L316. Dan, I had known since just prior to Ryan and interacted with him via internet chatroom, e-mail, forums (S.I.N., 600, and CoMS), and general trolling on a daily basis for a few years. Razor sharp, that kid is for sure. That’s it my whole connection laid-out for all to see. Never exchanged with Anton Long, Christos Beest, or really anyone else to my knowledge. Well that’s only kind of true, Jall and I did have a brief exchange or two via PM.
So what was the point of that long winded history lesson? I’m writing this now; completely of my own accord and not perpetuating some “Socio-political master agenda”. The reason you see the Sigil in the sidebar of this site is because through my study of a large amount of texts and interactions with associates (those described listed above), I have determined that my aim, mindset, and beliefs are kindred to the ONA. Sure there are some variances and disagreements, but nothing that would warrant throwing the baby out with the bath water. Does that even make me O9A? How about you decide for yourself?
Now on to the “logic” that I found to be just as wanting as the beard on his face. Traditional Satan-ism as ascribed by the O9A is the ONLY valid satan-ism. The fact that I have to even point this out pains me considerably. You base your whole argument on 3 conditions:
- ONA has an agenda
- ONA are evil and participate in/encourage crime
- ONA view satan-ism as a tool or entry point.
The fact that you are using your own experience of juvenile antics and costume play to suppose; that all of the rest of us have a “super-villain mentality” is extremely telling. What is even more telling, is that you clearly mention “socially acceptable behavior”; as if anyone should give a fuck what is socially acceptable. It is no wonder to me at all, that you believe you are being manipulated to “do something really fucking stupid”. You certainly are being duped, but it isn’t by the O9A kid; you are lying to yourself. You are not a satanist, from what I can see you’re a “dark neo-pagan” and that’s giving you a lot of wiggle room. If you were actually putting in ANY Work at all, you should have gleaned these things by now:
Satan-ism IS an entry point; because once you understand the theory, doctrine, and system; and you have put them into practice; you will realize that you have been or are being Satanic. You have become like Satan! THIS is why you are encouraged to aspire to commit crime. It is the knowledge/gnosis gained from each act that moves you away from your magian/puritan mundane existence. Praxis is where you gain YOUR power and that is true anywhere on the LHP. If you don’t get that… I’m sorry Forrest, but this ain’t your box of chocolates. Satan is not a spiritual path or religion, that shit is for puritan posers like yourself.
Does the Order of Nine Angles have an agenda? Yes. Will they use whatever tactics, deeds, or manipulation necessary to accomplish it? Fuck Yes! Is western ideology, values, and society a festering fucking cancer to our species? You ARE DEAD FUCKING RIGHT! This crybaby culture of i-wannabe-specialism; those who just want to put on their little ceremonial robes, do a few lines of yayo, and rub one out by the candle light as they chant some silly bastardized latin phrases without paying in to the Current; is the calling card of society’s rotting stench. It is by their description, that we are inherently evil, and so what?? So fucking be it! Aren’t you late for Sunday School?
T.C. Downey (I will proof read later)
Welcome back interwebs. I cannot really say I’ve missed you. There has been a couple of recent events that have brought me back to this domain. First the passing of my dear old friend, who once authored posts in this collection of various entries; Jason Sorrell / Ego Diabolus. Jason passed away on 2/22/2021. I’m not certain the particulars of why he passed so young. Nor do I care to disclose what information, I do possess about this event. Let us just celebrate the life of a man that truly lived a Satanic life. Jason understood the current on a very intuitive level, as well as, on a highly sophisticated philosophical and psychological level. He had the ability to dissertate his understanding on a very practical level. You can view his postings in right column under his name. I implore you to do so.
Speaking of having the ability to communicate very large complex concepts in a very practical manner; this brings me to the second event which has spawned my reemergence. I was recently contacted by yet another gifted thinker and also dear old friend, Chloe also known as Chloe352. This was a completely arbitrary event and though she inquired on Jason’s well being, she was totally unaware of his passing. Pure happenstance but it struck a resonance within me; one which I can only view it as providence. She was touching base with me, and filling me in on some less personal events she knew would interest me. It seems the ONA has recently caught the attention of different government agencies not just domestic but in various other regions of the world. You can read about it yourself on the o9a.org WordPress. I was informed that a few orgs and public figures had also passed, disappeared, or are in their death throws.
This opened my eyes to the current state of “satanism”. Notice I left the word lowercase. Chloe; in Nexion Zine 7.1 astutely points out that -ism is a distinctive doctrine, theory, system, or practice. Not a religion, not in my eyes anyway. I like to take Occam’s Razor and shave it right to the bone. You see to me, satan-ism is the doctrine, theory, system, practice of being satanic. That’s right kiddies, its an action; it’s something you do. More accurately, it is the way things are to be done. A search on google, reveals one sad, sad fact there is very little satan-ism going on out there, at least as a movement. I cannot speak for or about folks on an individual level, I; myself live a very satanic lifestyle and have not really contributed to the tradition in any aeonic sense. For a brief time I may have carried a little notoriety, but that’s probably just my own vanity talking. It’s now time to change that. So I’m calling myself out; I’m calling you out!
You may be thinking to yourself, “I am a troo satanist! I live my life by the core concepts of it. My deeds do in fact match my ideals. Why is it my responsibility to contribute?”, however for those words to be truthful; consider this. The mandate is intertwined in the very meaning of the words chosen to mascot this “system of being”, satan literally means “adversary; one who plots against” and devil; slanderer, accuser. So if you think being a hokey-halloween hung over- hack with a hedonistic appetite and a love for horror movies is sufficient to demonstrate solidarity; you are a fucking poser, plastic, a fraud, a fake, and you are not who I’m talking to right now. I could give two fucks, if you overdosed on 30 hits of LSD while getting ass-fucked by a gang of midget orangutans, as you performed a black mass ritual, live on TinyChat with a billion followers as witness. You are still a counterfeit and you will be culled.
Culling what an eerie word, no matter in what sense you are discussing it. Oxford says it is a reduction of a wild animal population by selective slaughter and the action of sending an inferior or surplus farm animal to be slaughtered. One might wonder the meaning when I say “no matter the sense you are discussing it.” when the definition is rather particular. You see there are other deaths besides physical ones. A physical death seems rather crude and non-congruent when placed in context of satan-ism and being satanic. Rather pointless and hollow then. Where’s the plotting? What would you be being adverse to? Where’s the slander and what of the accusation? Though there might be momentary gratification, ultimately there’s nothing really Satanic, maybe satanic in some instances, but nothing capital about it. It does nothing for the aeonic calling.
Instead slaughtering your credibility and use of the theory that you might be satanic (a yes its barely a theory), seems more fitting an undertaking. So if this fits you, maybe start calling yourself what you are; false. Because I have returned and I am your enemy.
Necromancy will be used to describe a particular set; drawing a minor relative reference to its established understandings. The descriptor, Necromancy was chosen due to its association to ‘invocation’ of (working of) past/alternate spirits. It is should be easily concluded that, we are drawing upon its synonymous interchangeability with ‘nigromancy’; meaning ‘black divination’; at least upon the completion of this text. It should be understood, that there is a special context in which ‘invocation’, ‘spirit’, ‘divination’, and other such ‘hot’ words are used . They will always be distinguished by ‘ ‘, as to continually build the context in which they are understood.
I offer no apologies for the institution of specialized language within this/or any other text produced by me. Put simply, it is the nature of language; that words adopt contextualized meaning. Language is a peculiar phenomenon, by its own nature both evolving and esoteric. It is in our very use that we find a vergence . It can be demonstrated that the right set of words, used at the right point in time; can ‘invoke ‘ (open) a channel of understanding in both the conscious, and subconscious often triggering action. There are those that would argue against the merits of N.L.P., hypnotism, and psychology (and whatever else fits into this category of science) as pseudosciences. Yet the proven effectiveness of advertising alone, makes small work of the matter. Reflecting upon, the recent national election ; I am convinced strung together the right way, (no matter the bullshit associated with) words hold power. That ladies and gents, is the key to ‘invocation’ nut-shelled.
‘Spirit’ is a dirty word these days. Which conjures up thoughts of the ‘supernatural’, mystical, and ghostly phenomena. For most these days, those are a hard pill to swallow. Since there is virtually no empirical evidence to substantiate Substance Dualism, this is understandable. This IS NOT the state of what I have imagined ‘spirit’ would be, it has been my understanding that ‘spirit’ was in interchangeable with ‘intensity’. Yet I cannot stress the peculiarity of the sense, I am describing. I contend to be in the ‘spirit’; simply means to manifest traits with intensity.
When you have school ‘spirit’, you emulate characteristics thought to represent that school. When a debate is ‘spirited’; it is because the arguing position’s intensity, gives it ‘spirit’. When your ‘spirits’ are high, we are talking about manifesting an emotional state that is intensely euphoric. If understood properly, it is describing a psycho-transformative state of a physical material. When I more properly examine it, it seems to hold qualities comparable to a ‘possession’. ‘Spirit’ seems to be acted through or itself acts through.
I then can understand where the muddling of ‘spirit’ moves into a ‘super natural’ stigma. A disciplined mind can make the distinction; we are not describing a non-material thing. Rather we are isolating a state/force enacting on a material thing for the purposes of examination, discussion, and enaction. No bogey-men required. Given you accept the premises laid out in the above few paragraphs; ‘Invoking’ the ‘spirit’ of Satan is calling for an intense manifestation of traits thought to represent Satan.
From this we are beckoned the question of why; why ‘invoke’ the ‘spirit’ of Satan? Why ‘invoke’ any ‘spirit’ at all? ‘Divination’ is the answer that firmly resounds to these ‘considerations’. Traditionally ‘divination’ is understood as the use of ‘super natural’ means to find out about the future or the unknown. This definition is deceptive to our conventional senses. What is deemed as ‘super natural’, is often accompanied with a spooky ghostly context; occurring outside the natural order. I contend, nothing can occur outside of the natural order. Even if we construct our model from a traditional scenario, within which we propose a haunting; it still verges within the natural order. I realize this is a plea on The Alchemy, but The Necromancy is not exclusive. The Alchemy tells us all things emerge within the natural order, exist as a transformative vergence; which is interconnected . So why do we in this one occurrence, assume a pejorative correlation to super? Am I mistaken to the paramount qualities of something super? Accepting the traditional understanding of ‘divination’ ; does this not mean the use of predominant, prime, supreme, and key means to finding out the future or unknown? To paraphrase Gurdjieff, one of my main influences; words truly only mean one thing. Words like other tools (means) of man’s design, when studied, understood, and practiced can become ‘super natural’.
Tonight’s word means ‘black divination’ ; Necromancy. ‘Black’ because unlike The Alchemy which seeks purification (simplification) through transmutation, it seeks absorption (complexification) through consumption. Necromancer’s seek to add to their field of influence, assimilation provides a rational means to this end. Not to simply “find out” the future or unknown, but to hold influence over them. To that effect, The Necromancer is a ‘black art’.
“I would like to see the concept of divination more correctly defined. Divination is often assumed to be a quest for information about the future. Rather, it is a quest simply for information, with which the person equipped can design the future.” – Jason Sorrell
An Alchemist’s aim is take something commonplace, and make it rare. Which in the end, alludes to all things having the potential to be rare. Necromancy has a different idea entirely.
In my discussion of ‘invocation’, I pointed to the idea, “words have power”. I hinted to the idea that, by understanding its meaning, relations, and intensities; you steadily tune the ability to wield it. Thereby essentially further complexifying the field of influence. As the intensification reaches iconic proportions, an embodiment of ‘spirit’ is recognizable. It is the ‘possession’ of/by this ‘spirit’ in which, The Necromancer; craft manifests.
“Really I am.”
“Nothing is wrong.”
“I have a good excuse.”
“I’ll do it tomorrow.”
“It’s good enough.”
“It doesn’t bother me.”
“I can’t do anything about it.”
“I deserve it.”
“It is the best I can do.”
“It is your fault.”
“You don’t understand.”
“It wasn’t me.”
“It isn’t fair.”
To the would-be Masters of the Universe, how are we to begin to control anything if we have no control of ourselves? How can we control ourselves if we have next-to-no idea who we are? How can we know who we are if we allow ourselves to be constantly changed by the winds of influence?
“Not me”, you say? Think your in control? I won’t argue with you, or even try to prove you wrong. Your fine just as you are. Better you remain the master of dreams.
To the rest that have the awareness of Socrates, who know that we do not know, how do we change?
We are living a lie, generally speaking. We are animals that have evolved to a point were we have relative mastery of our environment. The natural environment no longer defines us. Instead, we define it. We have been raised in an artificial environment, an artifice that goes beyond merely lights in the deepest night and cool breezes on the hottest summer day. Our mental idea of our environment, our world, our society and culture, is based not on observation and experience, but on what we have been told it should be. As animals, it is only natural that we have adapted to that environment, and the result is that we are artificial people.
As artificial people, we are not “Human” as I recognize the term, but something else. Perhaps we are like machines wearing human masks. What does a machine do? A machine follows a predetermined pattern. A machine follows an established program. A machine performs a preset function when it is activated externally, or when conditions merits action. The action of a machine is neither right nor wrong. The action of a machine is either appropriate to the situation or it is not. Happenstance, or luck, is the only difference between action that fits the situation and action that is inappropriate.
One of the most important functions of these machines, a function that is key to their programing, is the ability to lie. The lies they tell that matter are to themselves, lies about what they “know”, or what is right or wrong. More over, the lies we as machines tell ourselves are cumulative. The more we tell them, the more we believe them. The more lies told, the more convincing the body of lies we create. Our lies support the lies of others, ensuring the safe and proper function of the system. To stop lying, and to stop tolerating the lies of others, is anathema to that system. The machines respond harshly to having their masks revealed. The artifice of self is a reflection of the artifice of the system. To have the lie revealed is to take responsibility for what is wrong with both the self and the world we are in.
Most have been programed not to want that kind of responsibility.
Based on my observation of these kinds of machines, I think for most the mask of lies does not fit. The few I have met who’s mask fit well I have felt a momentary sympathy for. They are truly trapped, cogs in the system that will probably grind them down to dust. Most masks do not fit, and when we sense it, we begin to wonder what is wrong with us, what is wrong with our world. Usually, we are distracted by something… our function as machines is activated by external forces, or someone comes along and helps adjust our mask and briefly relieves the feeling of discomfort our slipping mask causes. For some, the sensation of the mask slipping is enough to make us aware of it. We feel that something is wrong, and we become focused on that sensation. Our discomfort becomes enough that we can resist the distractions and the urges to conform from our peers.
We risk ostracism, but chance gaining real power and maybe even freedom.
The first step in avoiding a trap is knowing of its existence. The lie of the system is a trap. It is a mire that sucks the actual Self deeper and deeper into darkness, leaving only the machine in our place. In order to begin to deny the artifice of the system, we must start with denying the lies we tell ourselves. In esoteric circles, this process is often referred to as “the third-eye turned inward” or “the perspective of Baphomet”. It is nothing more than a sincere, objective, and deliberate observation and study of the self. While this may sound simple, truly achieving an objective and honest perspective of the self takes immense effort. The lie is initially far more comfortable than the truth. We all want to believe that we are better than we really are. The system encourages this kind of lie. We are fully invested in our masks, preferring to believe that the artifice is who we really are; we are our social status, our Facebook account, our job, rather than being something unique, independent, and consistent. Excising the lies about ourselves requires an intentional destruction of our false sense of self that we are invested in.
If we have a hope of even beginning this struggle, then we begin with a marginal sense of who or what we may be. Our goal is to know, not to guess, assume, or pretend that we have qualities we do not. We must stop dreaming of being Human, and begin to wake to being. Our program has internal fail-safes against the thoughts that suggest real independence, real observation, and real self-assessment. External processes also exist to encourage us to accept the lie, to doubt the truth, and to respond violently to those who try to reach too far too quickly. It is a dangerous process.
In observing the lies we live, one of the first things that will become apparent is how much of our time is engaged in activities that we find distasteful. Where is our zest for life? Where is the passion for those things we pursue? For so many of us, our lives are simply one compromise after another, one accommodation after another, settling for what is easily within reach rather than striving to fulfill our desires (if and when we know enough about ourselves to know our own desires and not chase what we have been told is worthy of our pursuit!). We do things we hate, and in turn learn to hate ourselves. A self loathing person is easier to control. If you are never good enough, never complete, never content, and you never know what any of those things mean, then any commercial that promised ambiguous fulfillment generates from you a mechanical response.
If this is true on the most superficial level, how much more deeply are we influenced? How much longer will we allow ourselves to be told that the missing piece to our lives is in our next purchase, cause, or political effort, instead of seeking to find it in ourselves?
We must stop being machines, easily manipulated through our programming by other machines. We must stop dreaming that we are Human. The lies we tell ourselves must end. Once we are each secure in our own truth, we find ourselves in a fortress that cannot be shaken. Mastery of the self is Mastery of the Universe.
January 28th of 1985 – The all-star cast of USA for Africa records its egalitarian mega-anthem “We Are The World”. A young couple is walking out of a cinema, having just seen; Star Trek III. Yes, indeed, the air wreaks like a youth group camping retreat filled with interlocking hands and unity songs. Just 13 days prior, Tancredo Neves was elected as the new Brazilian President ending its 21 year military rule. 5 days later, President Ronald Regan was sworn in for his second term. Later that year Regan will sit down for the first time with Gorbachev. The first Nintendo game system is released, complete with Super Mario Bros. Calvin and Hobbes appears in 35 papers. Microsoft released Windows 1.0. The peace sign adorns most ‘pop’ merchandise and accessories. People far and wide are bombarded with a constant media exposure to two ideas.
Terror was the first of these ideas. The Cold War, Japan Air # 123, The quakes of Santiago and Valparaiso, and the UK’s National ‘Glow-Worm’ Day are exemplary evidence to support this idea. Civil unrest, cultural tension, and the threat of a nuclear world war; flow constantly and are ever present in television, radio, newspapers, movies, music videos, and comic books. It seemed as though all of humanity had finally opened their eyes to the brutal nature of the world. The bleeding hearts cried loudly for equality, the religious zealots preached fire and brimstone, and Coca-Cola fans protested to get the original formula back in production. Society was paralyzed by the fright of what cruelties our fellow man is capable of.
The second of these ideas, the undercurrent of the first, was either directly featured or the assumed logical solution for the abhorrent state of the world; Unity. Interestingly an multifaceted allegorical representation of this idea exists; 1985 was the year the GNU Manifesto was written. Stallman got it on some levels, but the software community back then was relatively small. Imagine if the whole world was in fact reflective of open source software. Suppose we all started off as this kernel of a person and then small modifications were made to our functionality, and finally we were given different aesthetics; would we not still be the same as the rest? After all Ubuntu and Fedora are still both Linux based, just repackaged and accessorized differently.
Strangely however, this does seem to be the case. Perhaps we are content in our individuality being surface deep. We are taught that prejudice, intolerance, immorality, and many other potentially beneficial modes of thinking are wrong; this forces us to make modifications beyond their debugged kernel. You will see this repeat on many different levels, and it always points back to the same idea. We here at Eminent Mind might even be no better; but we are striving to be different. We recognize that sociopolitical pressures force a certain debugging process to our core self. The GCr mandates behavioral and cognitive protocols. The Puritan Mandate and the Assimilative Automation are two of such protocols which are counter to the natural Calling and Intentional Considering.
You are expected to comply by the order of Assimilative Automation. We are convinced that we cannot exist outside of the system. You must be participatory, and should you choose not to be; well we all know they’ll slap you right back in line. To forward this agenda, we are constantly encouraged to do 3 things; reestablish, conform, and be compliant. History shows that for people in lower social classes the best strategy is communal living. Living in the extended family (clan) gives reinforcement of security and resources, yet we are told to go off to college and then settle wherever a position opens in the particular field of training you’ve received. In the event you establish in your home town, certain factors will always arise to break a part the clan unit.
Employers will offer the opportunity for advancement at the cost of relocation. Regulations are placed on how many people can occupy one building, and how many buildings can occupy one piece of land. In 1971 another factor was put in place that also continued the dilution of community, Swann v. Charlotte-Mecklenburg Board of Education the Supreme Court ruled unanimously that forced busing of students may be ordered to achieve racial desegregation. Which in 1985 was nearing its peak. Not only was this forcing cultural conformity, but because of the difficulty parents were having with distance of schools from their residence and layered times different grades would start and end; it was wearing on the harmony of the traditional nuclear family. Creating a feeling of alienation from heritage and family, an insurmountable detachment; left what little security and reliance had remained vaporized.
Songs like “Everybody Wants To Rule The World”, “We Don’t Need Another Hero”, and ” Jungle Love” saturate the airwaves of 1985 running rampant on the billboard. At the same time a team of executives are discussing the viral success of the then 4 year old MTV. Never before had it been so easy to commercialize popular trends. What would come next was the result of a century long thrust.
To Be Continued…
From this, we are given the impression; that everything is hinged together in a logical sequence of events which accidentally produced man. The universe is nothing more than a senseless systematic chain reaction that is blind and without purpose to the logical. As we attempted to accurately detail the processes and mechanisms of the universe, we fail disastrously to take into account in our calculations; conscious experience. We cannot capture the meaning of perception, nor depict the nature thought. The abstract and mental system of mathematical symbols is void of human experience, spirituality, and creativity.
Let us examine this through a specific lens. From a particle level to the perceptual level, man is built up from small groups working together. Like pixels to the picture, the evidence of man’s own emergence is undeniable. In this perception every phenomenon is situated in its relationship to others, and comes from a ‘Current’ (field/dimension) of energy.
All our thoughts, our feelings, and every movement of the body is the manifestation of a specific energy. In our mindless state, that current is constantly swelling and flooding. The endless focus and blur that happens as we shift from thought to feeling to sensation creates a fluctuating series of impulses. We deceive ourselves by calling those impulses “me” or “I”. It creates a wall of illusion professing it is acting of will power and independence. As one desire is crystallized and then either fulfilled or dismissed, it is quickly replaced with another. We become slave to a pattern of contradiction in which there can be no continuity of intention. We are undoubtedly, accepted or not; all a piece of a larger reality. As slaves to this reality, we succumb to the Puritan continuity of intention. Intuitively we sense this but mistrust the value of intuition.
Continuity of intention is recognized by the Slyman as Calling. Calling can be an amazing tool of transformation. When used consciously it can unlock the doors of transformation and allow us to create our Eminent Mind. However it bears the potential for greater evils of the psyche.
In the article The Relative Nature of the Concept ‘Freedom’, Mr Jason Sorrell brilliantly casts ‘need’ (the catalyst of ‘I’) and the slight-of-hand sorcery that comes, when we do not actively pick which impulses to consciously experience. Mr Sorrell handsomely demonstrates that the level of dependency on the fulfillment of our needs through the system is directly proportionate to our level of ‘freedom’. The assertion is that in order to participate within a system, you must conform to a certain standard (morality). That standard is usually where your contributing value is defined. Sorrell waxes it much better than I do. So I would suggest reading the previously linked article.
Scientifically we are defined as an organism; a form of life composed of mutually interdependent parts that maintain various vital processes. It has been my contention (in previous writings) things… happen, and this occurs on scales of marginal proportioning; but this does not exclude peculiar commonalities shared by things on marginally separate levels. This is why I, so often marvel at the wisdom of the enneagram, we wish to perceive a direct connection (line) between two seemingly opposing/similar points on different levels; its wisdom show us this is not the case. Let’s not trail off, on Sacred Geometry; we need only borrows its influence.
Life composed of mutually interdependent parts that maintain various vital processes. When placed in the context of a worldly sense, is indicative of society. The symbolic perception suggests, that we can then develop these types organism; just as we can develop our own beings.
If by living deliberately we can emerge a stronger being in physicality, mentality, and psychology; why then can it not work socially? Live deliberately… Emerge!
The way my life is run, currently, will never be enough. I want out of this slave pen. I think my path is taking me there, but at the same time I can’t help wondering if I’m really just scuttling from one end of the cage to the other (the side with the better view). What will it take to truly be free? What qualifies as good enough?
Immediately I want to say that true freedom happens only when we can precede in any direction desired without obstruction. However problematic it seems for freedom to become a reality, I cannot with clear conscience ignore a reoccurring observation I have made. Every person I have ever asked this one simple question, has answered it the same. “Do you have a sense of purpose?”, in every instance the response has been to the affirmative.
From the Materialists who believe all things are deterministic, to the Creationists who claim divine Will, and every shade of thinking between each has the idea the we have a role. Rightly so, who can honestly deny that we impact the causal; with every breath we draw. From what I have also gathered, another commonality observed is our quest for this ‘calling‘.
Even more impressive is that this happens on many scales, with an almost eerie congruence; we see one behavior manifested on marginal levels of scaling. I remember being completely fascinated, when being informed that a piece of glass; was in fact not in a truly stationary state. Imagine, over just a few hundred years; what was once a completely level surfaced window, will be thicker toward the bottom and thinner at the top. I marvel even more at the molecule and the mechanical manifestation of material.
One morning swimming at a spring, I started thinking about the current I was walking against. My mind drifted to maps of ocean currents moving, I thought about how it resembled the moving air streams above, everything seeming in motion. It then occurred to me that we use this type of analysis in second nature. I realize none of these are new ideas, it builds a sufficient platform for what I propose might place this square in alignment.
I won’t suggest I have any undeniable truth or solution, but I have some hard-pressed questions to which could open the doors to real answers. If we feel hungry does our body not call to be nourished? If we need sleep do our heads not lean towards the pillow? Say we are addicted to a cigarette, do we not have driving cravings? What happens when your sex drive, cannot be satisfied; do you not boil with frustration? Is it not possible, a woman’s compulsion for chocolate; mirrors the flirtatiousness of Le Femme Fatale ( Our Lady Fate)?
Not to labor the our point of reference unnecessarily, I have but two questions more and my closing.
If we should have meaning (subjected to the filling of physical and psychological needs) , yet be able to to affect the casual to the point of holding responsibility; are we not then mandated by the health of our being to tap our potential? This of course demands an honest analysis of priorities, structure, philosophy, process, and ideals; none the less no man is just born, they’ve all grown. Growing is difficult on some levels, but all must do so together. What then can we say is our true obstructions, and how can they be removed?
Freedom is progression without out obstruction. Without Will or Calling we collapse into happenstance; no different than the currents of the ocean or winds of the air. Though we surely will never be free of Influence, we can choose which currents, on what level; to ride. Live deliberately.
I begin today, as I began any day before, with the notion that nothing around me seems natural. I don’t mean I was uncomfortable in my home, rather that so much of our lives is a forced existence. Some might argue that this ‘world’ we live in has come about a natural occurrence. I would remark that just because you can stick the barrel of a revolver firmly up your arse and discharge it, does not make it a wise idea. Why are we expected to just accept it as status quo ?
Why in our minds, do we make excuses; claiming things such as “I’m one man, what can I do about it?” I often hear folks say, ” The system isn’t perfect, but what would work better? The grass is not greener on the other side.”; to which I address with “For some any grass is greener than the grass they’ve been chewing on for so many years”, “Show me where I can go and not be forced to participate under tyranny of some form or the other.”. I further this by asking if such a place does not exist, if I cannot find a system of my liking, what then are my options but to forge one?
Is it not tyranny, when you are forced to conform to the ethics and principles, subjected to laws and standards of a particular region; simply because you are born to it? Even if one exists that meets the measure of your sound reason’s judgement, what is the reality that you’ll ever make it to the ‘land that has promise’? Will the economy be friendly enough to allow for your departure from it? Will your current country allow your departure from it? Will the favored country welcome you with open arms? Can you give up all the people which you hold dear to you? Should you be the one forced to uproot and go?
It seems perfectly reasonable to me, that when contrasting these questions with the Slyman’s perspective; knowing not only the proper sequence of emergence, but what is of organic phenomenon and is purely artifice; we might come to a grim reality. Men lack accountability, man has always done so. History exists purely to justify the wrongs of mankind. Man has, is, and will continue to do very reckless things. We’ve learned how to dupe ourselves and it helps us sleep at night. We refuse to look at the bigger picture, as we judgingly point our fingers at our neighbors, coworkers, and families. Mommy did not hug me enough when I was little, so its ok to be chauvinistic.
It is as if, a long time ago someone penned your glorious tragic comedy; with brilliance to suit your role. You proudly take stage left and curtsey on your cue. Maybe you are satisfied to make due with your lot in life. What if I am not? Would you argue that I should use the system to change it? What if that system is failing? How can one expect a favorable outcome from a system that fails to see every man and woman within it secured and stabilized? What does it say for that system? Why are we forced to accept ‘good enough’?